Thursday, December 26, 2013

If you are reading this...

Hey y'all,
So, for some reason, I got a crazy amount a pageviews today.. Maybe someone kept refreshing the page. Lol. ;-P
Anyways, if you are reading this, I'd love your feedback on my posts and the blog. I know some people read it. If this blog is encouraging to you, let me know. If you find it interesting, let me know. If you find it odd and weird and all that fun stuff, let me know. I want to know what you guys think of it and why you take the time to read these posts. So, please comment if you don't mind and/or rate the post at the bottom. That would be greatly appreciated. Also, let me know if you have any ideas for me to blog about.
Thanks guys!

Wednesday, December 25, 2013


Christmas is here upon us and already almost done!!
This year, it kind of came upon me in a different way... It still doesn't feel much like Christmas to me.
But... that doesn't mean that I should end this day without really thinking of the real reason that we are celebrating.
We are celebrating Christ who came to earth as a little baby totally dependent on His mother. He grew up being our ultimate example- an example for us to mirror in everything we do. And finally, accomplished His goal- dying for the sins of the world.
The family time, the presents, and the food are nice, but let each and every one of us look to Christ and remember Him and the price He paid to come down here from heaven to this dark, sinful earth. For you. And for me.
Happy Birthday, Jesus. <3

Tuesday, December 24, 2013

A Sunday Communion

The following poem was written by a friend of mine. 
Enjoy. :) 

A Sunday Communion:

As the offertory music plays,
And I stare blankly down a ways,
A small object grabs my gaze,
It is the cup of His last day.

The cup is empty now,
And it reminds me how,
My Lord and Savior died,
That I might be justified.

The pain that He has born,
To save this sinner torn,
It's more than I can bare,
To think he took my share.

And now, as I stare,
At that cup, sitting there,
Underneath a person's seat,
Empty, tipped over, and discreet,

I think of how He is overlooked,
By sinners who toss aside His book.

A sense of awe comes over me.

Tuesday, December 17, 2013

My Testimony

I was born in sunny San Diego on June 26th, 1998 to two Christian parents. Growing up in a Christian family, I always knew about Jesus. My parents made sure I knew all about HIM. I was an independent, stubborn, strong-willed, and a little on the rebellious side kind of kid… Everything had to be my way. So, of course it didn’t go well when I found out that my mom was having another kid. Like, why’d she need another when she had me??? Anyways…. Hannah was born and everything changed.
A few years later, while reading through the book of Acts, Hannah decided that she wanted to get baptized. I also decided to do it too. I knew about Jesus. I knew what He did for me. And I believe at that point I was already saved. But since Hannah was getting baptized I could not and would not let her do that before/without me. So, I was baptized for the wrong reasons. This was all around when I was 7ish.
My life then changed drastically again- we started doing foster care. Victoria, my sister-to-be, stepped into my life. She challenged me. Lots. We fought and fought. But I got what I always wanted- a sister my age… It was hard for me to let someone step into my life and take up even more of my mom’s time. By the time we were done, I had two more amazing sisters. So, now I had three. Obviously God didn’t want me to be the only child. He had bigger plans. These sisters helped to tear down the bad stuff, build up the good stuff, and remold my character into something so much better. Because of them, I have come so much further than I would have if I had stayed the only child.
At this point in time, my parent’s religion was also mine. I finally came to that point where I had to decide to step away from it or make it my own too. I decided to make it my own. I told God that I would never ever not be a Christian. I didn’t want to die and get sent to hell…. so I decided that was the best thing to do. But it was hard. I went through times in my life where I doubted Him. I doubted my faith and even doubted myself as being a real Christian. But God got me through that.. He remained faithful when I was faithless.
I’ve noticed that I suffer from something like depression… I have huge mood swings. I feel fine for a few months. And then I get super grumpy and just plain miserable half the time for another few months. In late March/early April, I took the next big step in a low time in my life. I took the depression to a different level.... worse than ever before...
Right after coming out of one of these really down times, I went to a leadership conference. The theme had a lot to do with discipleship, but the thing that really stuck with me really good was when we sang I Surrender All on the last day. I noticed that I wasn’t ready to surrender all this to the Lord. I wrote on my blog post about the trip: “While we were singing I Surrender All, I started to open my hands in worship (When I worship I sometimes like to show I surrender or thankfulness to the Lord by raising my hands/arms and opening my hands). But then came the fight inside... I wasn't ready to surrender all. No. I was still holding onto my troubles and my hurts. The pain and hate I had been having inside me. I realized I wasn't ready to give it over to God. I wasn't ready to let Him help me. I had been pushing Him away. I didn't really want His help, and in the process I was making decisions that I never should have. I was hurting Him. I was hurting those around me. I was hurting myself. After all that, I know I need to hand it all over. I need to raise my white flag of surrender. I need to give Him my hurts, my insecurities, and all the other junk I've been holding onto.”
After coming home and still knowing I need to fix it, I went outside in tears and just talked to the Lord. I told Him about my life, how I felt, etc. And told Him I wanted to fully surrender to Him.
Something changed in me after that night. But the struggle to surrender everything continuously is still a huge one for me. It will always be. Because I’m stubborn, independent, and strong-willed. And a rebel. But- With God’s strength, I can surrender again and again.

I’ve been saved by God’s grace. Thank You, Jesus.

Thursday, December 12, 2013


I know I have posted so many posts previously about friendship, but now, I must do it again.

When I was younger, I always had friends. Almost everyone is your friend when you are little. Then you get a little older, kids become less nice; you become more unforgiving; and you get fewer friends. When I was younger, my best friends were mostly guys. I got along better with them. I saw girls as sort of mean. And so, I got along better with the laid back guys. But then..... all of a sudden.... I became older (NO WAY!!!! I actually got older.... I know it's hard to believe.... Anyways!) and it was suddenly awkward to have a guy as your closest friend. It became awkward for both sides. So although I am still friends with him, it isn't the same as it used to be. We sort of drifted apart a little bit. Although, we will always be dear friends. :)
So, after that, I was left at what you might call "friendless". My closest friend and the only person I felt like I could talk to about life with was someone who I always fought with. And then.. I got this longing for a friend.. like a really strong one. Not just like a friend. But a close friend. A very good friend. Someone I could be myself around and be totally open and honest with. And someone who would be able to do the same with me. I know some people call that kind of friend a best friend, but I don't really use the term.
So, along came a girl. And I guess it was probably a "finally!!" moment for me. This was what I wanted and now there was someone it might be possible with. I gave this friend everything. She could know anything and everything she wanted about me. But. Something was not right... it seemed one-sided... It seemed like I cared and showed it.. and she cared but didn't show it. We'd have a problem. I'd try to explain so we could fix it. It never worked. There were times when I was hurt. Very badly hurt. And finally.... after trying and trying and trying and telling myself that I wasn't going to give up...... I decided that I couldn't go on with her being my closest friend. IT wasn't working....
Talk about a first failure... my first real try at a real teenager friendship and it got washed down the gutter.
I know that I wasn't perfect at all in that friendship. I am still learning how to be a better friend. And that time I failed. Now, I had to pick myself up... and try again....
I just don't get it. Why can't there be such a thing as a best friend forever? I mean... I look and hear about that stuff.... and I'm like- FOREVER?!?!? (Well...... sort of...) Just... it's sort of unbelievable. Now, I believe there can be such a thing as a best friend forever... they are just so so so rare.
So, a little advice if you want to have a forever friendship with someone.
1. Keep it healthy.
         Don't let it be one-sided. Keep up your side of the friendship. Don't just gain from the friendship. Give to the friendship.
2. Be faithful.
        Don't leave this person. Don't go find someone else who you think is "better". Like seriously people... If you want a friend forever, You got to be there for them forever.
3. Communicate
       Don't become frustrated, angry, etc. and let it build up in you. Instead, explain what's bothering you to the person. Also, make sure this person knows that you care about them, love them, and appreciate them. Build them up with your words. Don't tear them down.
4. Don't gossip
       Don't gossip about your friend behind their back. That's being unfaithful too. They trust you. Don't do that.
5. Let the Lord be in the center of your friendship
       "And a threefold cord is not quickly broken." -Ecclesiastes 4:12b (NKJV)

Friends can be forever. But you have to treat them like you want them forever. 
Let me know your thoughts on the subject. And let me know if you have any other pieces of advice for keeping a forever friend. :)

"If you're alone, I'll be your shadow. If you want to cry, I'll be your shoulder. If you want a hug, I'll be your pillow. If you need to be happy, I'll be your smile. But anytime you need a friend, I'll just be me."

Saturday, December 7, 2013

Ladies and Gentlemen

Before you read this post: Please note that I understand there are many different views and opinions on this topic. The following are mine.

So, there is this thing that most people in my generation seem to have forgotten about- a lady and a gentleman. The only reason I haven't forgotten is because I have been blessed with a few guy friends that actually know how to be what I consider a gentlemen.

My definition of a gentleman: A young man/man who is willing to put the wants and needs of a young woman/woman above himself. He doesn't shame, work to offend, or irritate a lady. He works instead to help the lady.

My definition of a lady: A young woman/woman who is willing to allow a gentleman to help assist her. She won't offend a gentleman by insisting that she can do things herself and push aside the hand that was offered for her benefit/help. She will encourage a gentleman's gentlemanliness behavior and not discourage his effort to treat her as he should treat her.

Our society doesn't seem to practice this kind of stuff. I find it surprising when a guy will actually open the door for me or offer to assist me with something. I think that even those boys who are gentlemen are oftentimes discouraged, because when they offer their assistance, a lot of times, the girl won't allow him to assist her. So, ladies, Respect them. Treat them as gentlemen. Respect them in the way that you dress. Don't try to draw attention to yourself through how you dress. That is not a way to show them that you respect them. Allow them to help you with things.

Boys discourage girls from being ladies because they don't treat them with the respect due to them as a female. Females are the more "fragile" type. Sort of like flowers.... pretty but fragile. So, boys, treat them respectfully and gently, but do not look down on them because they are more "fragile" than you boys.

Let me know what your view are in this area. It would be cool to see different opinions/views. :)